the nights that i spend strolling along the solid ground keeps me from falling through, all i want is to just feel the warmth arise straight up into my body. the silence of the cars passing by leaves me alone, i shut my eyes and picture the place that i find peace at, my mind is not at ease its filled with disconnected feelings. the porch i wish i could just rest my worries on subsides from my ideals, this rough tug into my heart is hard to seal away. im pushed to the point where i've reached my hollowed out soul and there it is, the remains of a confused border not knowing where to make the incision, and how to exactly make it straight.
i deny the takeover of loss, the presence of dawn has uncovered itself it shines to show me the way. as i pull up the black signs in the sand skim over the top of my layed out thoughts. the graze onto my sensitive skin, ignites the brutally cold blows onto my neck, im closed and open to the sensation of new shivers that are temptingly dripping slowly down every inch of my back, as it taps into my brain, second by second i stop and pause turning to the direction of the unpredictable noises im caught off guard by the image, the image of something blurred. the travel of my focus outward leads me to the lake, and the reflection of the moons glory shines upon the still water marking a path of wonders straight to my stance. at this very moment, 10 : 12.. i know i am meant to be here, through all the heartaches and headaches, i know that this is it, there is no side street to walk onto, no broken yellow rectangles on the road to follow, this is now.
and no matter how bad the burns sting, i can't change it.
i can only hope, embrace and try... to make my way through it.
so here i am, please just find thee a way.
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